Many children struggle with self-doubt, shyness, or a fear of failure. These feelings can hold them back at school, in friendships, and when trying new things. Left unaddressed, low confidence in childhood can grow into lasting self-esteem issues. But with the right support, children can learn to feel more confident, resilient, and proud of who they are. Learning how to build confidence in children can transform not just how they feel, but how they approach life.
Understanding Low Confidence in Children
Children with low confidence often worry about getting things wrong, being laughed at, or not being good enough. They may avoid new experiences or stay quiet in class even when they know the answer. Some become overly dependent on reassurance, while others act out to cover up their insecurities.
These behaviours are not a sign of weakness. They are often protective strategies, shaped by a child’s experiences, personality, or past challenges. Even small setbacks can feel big to a child and affect how they see themselves.
Children may also compare themselves to others, especially in social settings or on social media, and feel as though they are falling short. This can lead to feelings of embarrassment, fear of failure, or the belief that they must be perfect to be accepted.
Over time, even a capable child may begin to doubt their own abilities or avoid situations where they feel exposed.
“Children are constantly testing the world to see if it’s safe to be themselves. If they get the message that it’s not, their confidence starts to shrink.”
Paul White, founder of TISPH, explains,
Why Confidence Struggles Can Persist
Children live in a world where they are still learning who they are. If they experience failure, criticism, or comparison at a sensitive moment, it can leave a lasting impression. Over time, their subconscious may start to believe that they are not capable, not clever, or not good enough.
Because children live in their imagination, these beliefs can become very vivid. But this same imaginative power also gives them a unique advantage in therapy. When it comes to knowing how to build confidence in children, working through the imagination is often one of the most effective approaches.
How Hypnotherapy Can Help
Hypnotherapy uses relaxation, guided imagery, and creative storytelling to speak to the child’s subconscious mind. It helps them let go of unhelpful beliefs and replace them with a stronger sense of who they really are. The process is calm, child-centred, and often enjoyable.
Therapists might help a child imagine themselves succeeding in something they currently fear, or create a story where the child becomes the hero of their own journey. These stories are not just play – they create new pathways in the brain.
Because children are already used to using their imagination, they tend to respond quickly to this type of support. On average, a child needs only half the number of sessions an adult would require for the same issue. Hypnotherapy is a gentle and effective option for parents looking at how to build confidence in children without pressure or fear.
A Story of Success
A ten-year-old girl came to therapy struggling with low self-esteem and fear of speaking in class. She described herself as “shy and rubbish at everything.” Her therapist used guided stories to help her imagine a version of herself who could speak clearly and feel proud. Within a few sessions, she started raising her hand in class and even read aloud during assembly.
Her teacher noticed a huge difference in her attitude. She still had wobbly days, but she now had the tools to work through them.
What to Expect from Hypnotherapy
Hypnotherapy sessions are gentle and enjoyable. The therapist uses language and techniques that suit the child’s age and personality. Sessions may include drawing, metaphor-based stories, role play, or simple calming exercises.
- Many children feel more confident after just a few sessions
- Parents are included and supported with ways to reinforce progress at home
Sessions are relaxed, friendly, and never push a child beyond what they are ready for.
Why Choose a TISPH-Qualified Therapist?
TISPH therapists are specially trained to work with children. They understand how to build confidence in children safely, respectfully, and in ways that last. With training in child development and safeguarding, they are equipped to help children grow emotionally as well as behaviourally.
You can find a qualified TISPH therapist using our Find a Hypnotherapist page.
Common Questions
Is hypnotherapy safe for children who are very shy or nervous?
Yes. Hypnotherapy is gentle, non-invasive, and tailored to each child’s comfort level. Many shy children find it easier than traditional talking therapies, especially when the goal is how to build confidence in children.
How many sessions will my child need?
Every child is different. Some see a shift after just two or three sessions, while others benefit from a longer course. Your therapist will discuss this with you after the first meeting, and guide you on the best approach to how to build confidence in children.